anxiety, blog, depression, mental health, motherhood, parenting, post natal depression, Recovery, Uncategorized, writing

Self-care.

How important is self-care when living with a mental health condition as a Mother?

You might say, not so much as when will I get the chance to implement self-care?!

Self-care to me though is about putting yourself first. It’s not just about bath bombs and chocolate, even though they aren’t bad idea! I’m talking about saying “NO” to something you may feel obligated to do when you feel overstretched – that’s self care too as it’s putting your needs first and foremost. It’s about protecting your energy and knowing your capabilities and limits. It’s about

taking the time to get to know yourself and become in tune with your emotions and what you can do to pamper your inner you.

I remember being told “A Mother Lion eats before her cubs” and that hit home as the Mother Lion has to refuel herself and make sure she is energised enough to look after her cubs, whereas most of us as Mums, when do we put ourselves first?

I know it’s also extremely hard too when we suffer with Mental Health needs to even get a shower or cook a meal some days but, we have to remember that if we can do bit by bit, step by step it will become routine and we will start reaping the benefits of self-care for our Mental Health.

How do you self-care?

Do you find it difficult to self-care as a Mum?

THOUGHTS?

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anxiety, blog, depression, mental health, motherhood, parenting, post natal depression, Recovery, Uncategorized, writing

Bloom where you are planted.

As Mothers we are so much more resilient than we give ourselves credit for.. We didn’t ask to have mental illness. We didn’t ask to have our happiness snatched from us at the most important times of our lives – when we become Mothers.

We didn’t ask to be crying whilst we are breast/formula feeding exhausted and staring into the soul of our little ones and thinking we don’t want to be here anymore.

We didn’t ask to sob, wondering what kind of life our child(ren) will live when we are gone when we are taunted with thoughts of suicide.

We didn’t ask to disengage and distance ourselves from partners/friends and family and sometimes them not understanding our illness that can’t be seen.

We didn’t ask to not be understood by those who matter the most to us.

We didn’t ask to not be heard by midwives and Doctors when we’ve told them that we don’t feel “right”. But from all of this it just shows how much strength we have in really uncomfortable situations that we find ourselves in and we are still here today growing and blooming where we have been planted in horrible circumstances.

I remember wondering “why me?” On so many occasions and it wasn’t until I started accepting that this was part of my journey that I actually could move on and heal. It’s kind of like when I resented myself I was sending out negative low vibrational energy into the universe so how could I expect to see the good in life to recover? Life throws us so much crap, so much – at times I have to laugh.

When you remember it’s a journey and these things are lessons to know our deeper self that’s when we truly can accept ourselves and begin the recovery process.

So when I say “Bloom where you are planted”. We all can, we’ve been doing it thus far!

anxiety, blog, depression, mental health, motherhood, parenting, post natal depression, Recovery, Uncategorized, writing

Fourth Trimester

This is when sh*t gets REALLY real.

After little one has been growing in your womb for three trimesters you’ve now come to the FOURTH!

What is the fourth trimester you may ask?

Well it’s the birth of not only your baby but YOU!

Do you know how hard this is?

To be born into Motherhood.. I remember having a C-Section and having my daughter handed to me in the recovery ward and I felt numb, I didn’t cry at the sight of my new born.

Does that mean there was something wrong with me? No – it means that every mother experiences their own emotion at the time of birth. Come on, we have been pregnant forever, given birth and now expected to instantly attach to our baby.

I remember feeling so lonely and isolated as a new Mum and could have done with a lot more support and advice in the Fourth Trimester.

It’s OK to ask for help, it’s OK to ask for support, It’s OK to ask for advice and it’s so, so, so important to talk about it all whether it be your partner, your friend, your health visitor, your midwife.

I believe if there was more support in the fourth trimester (which is from birth to 3months post-partum) this could reduce the risk of psychological deterioration in new Mums.

THOUGHTS?